My Carpet, Tis of Thee

My Carpet, Tis of Thee is the ninth episode of the second RIS Bouteina season.

Tagline

While the Romulans on Starbase 47 are still eating bread like there is no tomorrow, they realize that the Lyrans have been acting strange for a while. Some of these Lyrans pride themselves in the carpets they get for their quarters.

Summary

Act One

Taev Radaik awakens and see no Lyrans on the deck, while Lovestospooch was down to the bakery to bake bread. Annika Hansen asks the computer system where the Lyrans are, and the computer tells her that the Lyrans are in a lineup for the Elephantine Carpet. The Lyrans say that a shipment of iCarpets is due to arrive shortly and some of them have waited the carpets for so long. Pfrizzek receives some new instructions from his superior, Lyran count Fikrohn. He asks Pfrizzek for Rakelli clothing, as well as a Bajoran sculpture, among other things.

Act Two

However, the carpet vendors say that the shipment of iCarpets will be delayed, while Eblan is commissioned a statue of Chulan. S'arah is commissioned clothes for the Count's couple, asking for iCarpets as payment. He was also handed concept pictures to do it. When the security guard conveys Rakelli's request, the Arbazan vendor asks if Rakelli wants to super-size the carpet, which Rakelli accepts. However, the large carpet being too large for Rakelli's quarters, he asks Relm to have his big carpet and saying that the Lyrans cannot afford to antagonize the Romulans now.

Act Three

Brianna Reiss is sent to Sabzevar Colony to fetch a shipment of iCarpets in order to appease the Lyrans in the starbase. She tells Vaebn Mairex that she only flies the cutter for cargo to do economic espionage, but she gets into a risk of mutiny over the rationale of the crew buying so many carpets. Once the carpets arrive, Vox'ula scrambles to get the most carpets for the Romulans, while Annika disapproves of this carpet frenzy, saying that eating more bread than Lyrans is enough. She then proceeds to preorder three large iCarpets only to cancel it afterwards.

Act Four

Vox'ula proceeds to retake the order from Annika, but he realizes that the Lyrans have already out-purchased the Romulans in the way of carpets, as he sees the length of the lineup in front of the Elephantine Carpet. He reiterates his wish to fleece the Lyrans of their carpets just as they would bread. Then Rihanna begins to sing her newest song, My Carpet, Tis of Thee. Lovestospooch gets the dinner readied, but Vox'ula quarrels them, ending only when Neleras fires his disruptor pistol to stun Vox'ula, even when Eblan and Rakelli are supposedly done with their orders.

Act Five

But they weren't quite done in the facts; they had to package their works. Only Eblan didn't file a request for carpets. When he did, Rihanna files hers as well. He was singing My Carpet, Tis of Thee in front of the Commodore and Pfrizzek then proceeded to record Disturbia, under the promise of actually receiving the carpet on behalf of the Triple-E Senates. When the Romulans actually get their carpets, Vox'ula installs the bulk of the carpets delivered in the crew quarters. Finally, Annika tells them that they shouldn't try to follow the fashion fads of their allies, or their enemies, in the future.

Production notes

Mandy Guilmain was a freshly-minted matriculant at Kinda Sorta College as of that episode, a character that would appear in Star Trek: The Stoneship Files 17 years later into the timeline

External link

• My Carpet, Tis of Thee on the RIS Bouteina boards