Star Trek Expanded Universe

Redshirt Computer is the seventeenth episode of the fourth RIS Bouteina season.


After flying for weeks in the border zone of the Hydran Kingdom with the Interstellar Concordium, the RIS Bouteina come across an old hatred, the Averment. But they realize that its crew doesn't quite want to fight this time around.


Act One[]

When Annika is sleeping, Taev Radaik has arranged a visit with some Veltrassai people. These people hailed them and they claimed to be journalists that wanted to celebrate Christmas onboard, as well as investigating critters. Also, in the counselor's office, Mizarh referred to some people onboard as "redshirt computers", especially Annika and Brianna, hurting Brianna. Also, Damar was brewing mead with Q'Naabian yeasts that yielded mead in two months' time rather than years. The journalist asked him where were the "living computers", leading the journalist to visit the counselor's office.

Act Two[]

When the journalist arrives in the sickbay, Mizarh remains silent as the journalist proceeds to ask his questions to both Annika Hansen and Brianna Reiss, who both proceed to tell events of their lives relevant to the journalist's questions, such as the moments where they realized their own intellect, their "weak moments" and their "force momentums". Brianna then revealed that she had science-related regrets and that she felt that she wasted her talent. And Mizarh finally explains what they meant by redshirt computers. Also, the people in the galley prepare their gift exchange as well as the food eaten during the reception.

Act Three[]

Lovestospooch then commented on Relm's mass, saying that she was very heavy. When she revealed her mass, she also said that Byzatium could weigh upwards of three tons, when Rakelli was busy making a new dress uniform for Taev. Because they were both in the Tal Prai'ex, he had the right to a discount. Also, he told the journalist that Rakelli fashion was more expensive, especially on Lakeshore Avenue on Rakellus. Rakelli then activates a holodeck program depicting Lakeshore Avenue, shopping for Manolo Blahnik shoes with holographic emitters, all containing an EMH. But they realize that they just pretended to do so.

Act Four[]

In Ten Forward, the Triple-E Senates started singing "Joy to the World" as the Christmas celebrations commence. The food was being brought to the tables: pastrami sandwiches, strawberry tarts, three-cup tribbles, as well as drinks. Annika complained that there were too much Vor'cha spices in her food, while others ate cheese with their bread. A brawl breaks out about how holes came to appear in the cheese. Later on, when Rakelli goes to the washroom, the journalist deactivates his vanity Emergency Medical Holographic program and steals it from him, as well as the Manolo Blahnik shoes in which the EMH was mounted.

Act Five[]

After the journalist stole her EMH, S'arah put herself to work to make a replacement "vanity EMH", because there was no way for her to recover it. Otto Mann then proceeds to sing Glory Unwanted and Terenar then comments that the Triple-E Senates have gone musically downhill, because of contradictory lyrics. Ilyana was being watched as she decided to start drinking the entire keg of Duff beer. Also, they warn Ilyana that it wasn't the place to drink that much alcohol. In the end, Aerv, Lovestospooch and M'Rex are getting promoted to erei'arrain to reward their faithful service to the Romulan Star Empire.


"Why did you just call me to a redshirt computer? I have feelings, you know. By saying that I am a redshirt computer, you are basically saying that I am an intelligent woman, yet I am devoid of emotions and feelings."
— Brianna Reiss, answering to Mizarh's statement
"This isn't the tryouts of the University of Montreal's drinking team!"
— Tama to Ilyana while she drank Duff beer

External link[]

RIS Bouteina episodes
Season 1
"The Departure" • "Distress Call" • "Take Me Out to the Zoo" • "Marianela" • "What about some D'oh!" • "Fundraiser" • "Declaration of Warcraft" • "No Child Left Untested" • "Manhunt" • "Eidolon" • "Four Redshirts and a Shirt" • "Merry Christmas" • "We're All In This Together" • "Marriage and Honeymoon"
Season 2
"Cloak, baby, Cloak!" • "Fury of the Prison Ships" • "Women's Dark Frontier" • "Easter Eggs" • "Bowser Shakedown" • "Sphere of Influence" • "Broken Bread" • "Extraordinary Summit" • "My Carpet, Tis of Thee" • "The Whole Kitten Kaboodle" • "Battle at the Grave of Thoughts" • "Redshirt Distribution" • "Bottle to Throttle" • "Quantic Fissure" • "Quantic Return" • "Blackrock and Roll" • "Kingdom Hospital" • "Monster-in-a-Box" • "A Tale of Two Holodecks" • "Grinch and Scrooge" • "Miracle in Whoville" • "Battle of Eight Beat" • "Planet of the Cheaters" • "How the Charter Was Won"
Season 3
"Yesterday's Lyrans" • "The Measure of a Romulan" • "Cost of Captivity" • "Hussade Contract" • "Degree of Liberty" • "Days of Wine and D'ohses" • "Doctor Rihanna" • "Grade Inflation, Part One" • "Grade Inflation, Part Two" • "Grade Inflation, Part Three" • "Holographic Family" • "There's no Coffee in the Nebula" • "Tobacco Quest" • "Super Size Me" • "Super Size Me Again" • "Limit at Plus Infinity" • "The Day Where Students Have Stopped Calculating" • "If At First You Don't Succeed" • "Going, going, gone" • "Drug Wars" • "Monopolis" • "TV Dinner" • "Love Plan" • "Spoiled Rotten"
Season 4
"Humans, Romulans and Space-Beasts" • "Vosteage" • "Ice Cream Parlor" • "Gogmagog" • "Relief and Refuge" • "Real Estate Liberty" • "High Priestess of Evacuation" • "Limit at Minus Infinity" • "Low-Cost Vacation" • "Back to School" • "Tribble Resupply" • "Midwife" • "Night of the Were-Hawks" • "Forlorn Hope" • "Party Quest" • "Combinatorics Nightmare" • "Redshirt Computer" • "Party School" • "Just Cause" • "Kathelet"
Season 5
"Resolution on Krant" • "Hilbert Hotel" • "New York Convention" • "Propane Dream" • "Hospital Blues" • "Home Sense" • "Homeward" • "Dr Jekyll and Dr Hyde" • "Varlamov Steak" • "Credit Card Scholarship" • "Black Sox" • "Jockship" • "Two-Speed Intellect" • "Toy Dream" • "A Hockey Game Broke Out" • "Ultimate Wager" • "Cigarette Redshirt" • "Rator III Awaits" • "Hystelic Kingdom"
Sequel: Star Trek: The Stoneship Files
Rakelli fan productions
Star Trek: Unity (fan film series): "New Order" | "New Order, Part Two" | "Addiction" | "Unity Unbound" | "2005" | "Out of the Shadows" | "Into the Fire" | "The Unit" | "Final Order" | "Doomsday, Part One" | "Doomsday, Part Two" | "The Scorched World" | "Moebius" | "Twilight"
Minor appearances: "Ancient Order" | "Duel of the Fates" | "Double Jeopardy"
RIS Bouteina: "Four Redshirts and a Shirt" | "Broken Bread" | "My Carpet, Tis of Thee" | "A Tale of Two Holodecks" | "Hussade Contract" | "Redshirt Computer" | "Home Sense"
Star Trek: The Stoneship Files: "Educational Armageddon"