Star Trek Expanded Universe

Two-Speed Intellect is the thirteenth episode of the fifth RIS Bouteina season.


When investigating an asteroid field for asteroids to mine, they receive a distress call from a Klingon ship, saying that the Romulans onboard the RIS Bouteina is their only hope for salvation.


Act One[]

In the middle of a survey mission, the Bouteina was hailed by a zombified commander. Being zombified, the officer arranged a rendezvous at Deep Space L-9 along the Lyran border. The crew had to figure out when was their 1600 hours since it isn't the same as Romulan time. They first identified the ship as a D7-class and they jumped to warp to get to the starbase. But they find out that it isn't a worn-out D7W but a VoDleH-class ship. Upon scanning the ship for zombies, the bad memories of the IKV Eidolon surface among the crew, with a zombie alert being called at the same time.

Act Two[]

The sensor readings revealed hundreds of zombies onboard, with M'Rex cooking tribbles as part of a larger plan to prevent redshirts from being eaten. Once the ship arrives near DSL-9, the Klingon crew aboard the IKS Ky'jecum invited them on the starbase. Annika Hansen reluctantly accepts to lead an away team to meet up with the wayward Klingons, with Aerv having to choose some redshirts in Rovas' stead. Once in the halls of the starbase, they are brought to a holodeck and they are told that the zombies are testing them. Once in the holodeck, the Ariennye holographic program is loaded into the machine.

Act Three[]

When in the starbase, they are handed some papers of zombie medicine and a psychology paper pertaining to what they call "intellectual speeds", perturbing Brianna Reiss. Once they are through reading the medical papers, they are told that one of them is their "Chosen One", and to ascertain this status, they are given a set of chemistry problems to solve, the most complicated of which is a problem of acidity. In addition, they have to solve the problems in the shimmering heat. They find that their problem pertains to gastric acids, thus prompting the zombified Klingons to drink the remedy they came up with.

Act Four[]

After solving the chemistry leg of their intellectual gauntlet, they are given a fairly simple enigma but unsolvable by the zombies. For some reason, Taev Radaik suspects that the enigma has something to do with cryptography. Once the enigma solved, they are taken to the goat locker, full of PADDs containing the logs of the starbase. Because of the Klingon script, they asked for Lovestospooch to come. Meanwhile, back on the ship, a Halloween party is thrown with one of the cooks of Ten Forward with elementary-school kids, with the highlight of the night being a witch brew contest organized in a classroom.

Act Five[]

The secondary away team discovered that the starbase was filled with zombies. Howeer, the primary away team discovers that their zombie troubles began with the IJN Eidolon many years ago. They also discover an all-too-familiar paper signed by Mijanou. This prompts Vox'ula to ask the commanding officer of the starbase to contact the Eidolon while the cure was being beamed out, with Mijanou telling them that the best cure for the Mijanou Syndrome was hylanatine mixed with lemon juice. Upon serving them the hylanatine mixed with the witch brews, the crews of both the ship and the starbase feel alive once again.

RIS Bouteina episodes
Season 1
"The Departure" • "Distress Call" • "Take Me Out to the Zoo" • "Marianela" • "What about some D'oh!" • "Fundraiser" • "Declaration of Warcraft" • "No Child Left Untested" • "Manhunt" • "Eidolon" • "Four Redshirts and a Shirt" • "Merry Christmas" • "We're All In This Together" • "Marriage and Honeymoon"
Season 2
"Cloak, baby, Cloak!" • "Fury of the Prison Ships" • "Women's Dark Frontier" • "Easter Eggs" • "Bowser Shakedown" • "Sphere of Influence" • "Broken Bread" • "Extraordinary Summit" • "My Carpet, Tis of Thee" • "The Whole Kitten Kaboodle" • "Battle at the Grave of Thoughts" • "Redshirt Distribution" • "Bottle to Throttle" • "Quantic Fissure" • "Quantic Return" • "Blackrock and Roll" • "Kingdom Hospital" • "Monster-in-a-Box" • "A Tale of Two Holodecks" • "Grinch and Scrooge" • "Miracle in Whoville" • "Battle of Eight Beat" • "Planet of the Cheaters" • "How the Charter Was Won"
Season 3
"Yesterday's Lyrans" • "The Measure of a Romulan" • "Cost of Captivity" • "Hussade Contract" • "Degree of Liberty" • "Days of Wine and D'ohses" • "Doctor Rihanna" • "Grade Inflation, Part One" • "Grade Inflation, Part Two" • "Grade Inflation, Part Three" • "Holographic Family" • "There's no Coffee in the Nebula" • "Tobacco Quest" • "Super Size Me" • "Super Size Me Again" • "Limit at Plus Infinity" • "The Day Where Students Have Stopped Calculating" • "If At First You Don't Succeed" • "Going, going, gone" • "Drug Wars" • "Monopolis" • "TV Dinner" • "Love Plan" • "Spoiled Rotten"
Season 4
"Humans, Romulans and Space-Beasts" • "Vosteage" • "Ice Cream Parlor" • "Gogmagog" • "Relief and Refuge" • "Real Estate Liberty" • "High Priestess of Evacuation" • "Limit at Minus Infinity" • "Low-Cost Vacation" • "Back to School" • "Tribble Resupply" • "Midwife" • "Night of the Were-Hawks" • "Forlorn Hope" • "Party Quest" • "Combinatorics Nightmare" • "Redshirt Computer" • "Party School" • "Just Cause" • "Kathelet"
Season 5
"Resolution on Krant" • "Hilbert Hotel" • "New York Convention" • "Propane Dream" • "Hospital Blues" • "Home Sense" • "Homeward" • "Dr Jekyll and Dr Hyde" • "Varlamov Steak" • "Credit Card Scholarship" • "Black Sox" • "Jockship" • "Two-Speed Intellect" • "Toy Dream" • "A Hockey Game Broke Out" • "Ultimate Wager" • "Cigarette Redshirt" • "Rator III Awaits" • "Hystelic Kingdom"
Sequel: Star Trek: The Stoneship Files

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